Palinode: I feel horrible. I didn't sleep much last night.
Schmutzie: How come?
Palinode: It was really weird. The building kept vibrating off and on.
Schmutzie: Really? The building was vibrating? Huh. That's weird, because I slept well all night.
Palinode: Yeah. I thought the upstairs neighbours might have some kind of machine running, but the vibrating only happened once in a while, so I can't figure out how the building kept vibrating like that.
The Palinode gets up to go to the bathroom. I move to sit up and realize that I am lying on top of something. I pull a vibrator out from under the covers and slide it into the drawer in my night table.Schmutzie: [calling down the hall] Strange. I can't imagine what caused the building to vibrate.
What I cannot figure out is how I managed to sleep through the night when my right butt cheek kept dialling up the vibration on a sex toy every time I rolled over. You would think that if anyone was going to have their sleep disrupted by the so-called "vibrating building", it would have been me.
Now, if you will excuse me, I have to run. I am low on batteries.